Hard decisions don't come easy; that's why they call them HARD.

Normally, there are some posts that I would just put on my kids blog, but there are times I share things on here when I feel it has something more to do with just my children. Recently my husband and I had a very hard decision to make regarding Hannah, our 5 yr. old. See, Hannah was born premature when I was 27 weeks pregnant and she weighed 1 lb. 9 oz. and was 11 in. long. She wasn't supposed to be born until Nov. 25, but instead took her first breath of life on Aug. 28th 2003. When Kindergarten enrollment began this summer we weren't sure if we should start her or not. The cut off age was to be 5 by Sept 1st, which she was just barely by 3 days ahead, but technically she really wasn't 5 (because her gestational birth would have her born on Nov. 25th). We had a hard decision to make. Should we push her a little and get her started early or have her wait until next year? We asked mounds of advice and even got her tested, which she passed, proving she would excel in K. So we went ahead with the decision to start her early, but as we began the school year I also volunteered at being the 'Room Mom' in her classroom. As I watched Hannah in comparison to the other students, I knew in my heart she wasn't ready. The other students were more mature and social; they were more independent and confident. Slowly, as I studied Hannah's involvement in the classroom, my heart ached as I realized she wasn't ready for K. and in time I began to see her regress in her classwork. Right before Christmas I received her progress report which showed 'M -' next to everything, with the exception of two area's which showed 'M'. ('M' for 'Meeting Expectations', and 'M -' for falling below expectations.) In my heart I knew what had to be done. I was nervous about talking to my husband because I knew he would frown upon withdrawing Hannah; as he is the type that believes pushing your child is better than not; which in his opinion is what is wrong with kids today; they aren't pushed to their fullest potential enough, but instead sit around watching TV all day or playing video games. Granted he has some truth in this but I knew Hannah's situation was different. After MUCH prayer, talking with my husband, then my husband and I both talking to the school principle, then more prayer, and more advise, we made the joint decision to withdraw Hannah and for me to work with her at home the remainder of this year and re-enroll her in K. again in the fall. It wasn't easy and it did sadden us a bit. But then we viewed it from God's perspective. How many times does God withdraw us when He knows we aren't ready for something? How many times has He taken me back to a place in my life that I never finished so that I can finally conquer those areas or fears or setbacks? Admittedly, He's done this often. With all of us from time to time, He interrupts, (that sounds too harsh...let me rephrase that...), He intervenes in order to put us right where we belong; not ahead of our intellect, nor behind our understanding; but rather right where He knows we need to be for our own sake and protection. And for Hannah's sake, God showed us that she needed more one-on-one time with just mommy as her 'teacher', in the same way we all need that one-on-one time with Him as ours.