Gross Encounters of The Third Kind!

Mamma needs a break! And boy does she ever! It started last week when I ran into something so horrible, so ugly, so grand and disgusting that I almost threw up on myself! My almost 6 year old daughter was getting ready for bed when she spotted it. She came running out of the hallway 'Momma, come quick there's a big bug in the hall!' (Dear God, please don't let it be another cockroach!) Unfortunately God didn't hear my plea and sure enough it was a cockroach, but not just any cockroach mind you, but one I could have thrown a saddle on and ridden around the block; it was huuuuuge! Now, just to keep you informed; if you reside in Texas as I do, having summer cockroaches in your home is not a sign that your house is dirty, but rather it's because the heat outdoors is so hot and humid that's it's quite common for bugs to try to find their way indoors of people homes, garages, or anywhere else to get out from under the scorching sun. The same is true for the opposite climates where very cold weather is common; as cockroaches look for the same kind of relief from freezing temperatures. Though some sites will tell you the weather is not a factor, I have heard over and over again by Houstonians that this is not the case; that in fact roaches are more prone to be seen inside your home during summer months. And to back this up, I can verify this first hand as this is more common time our family and friends has witnessed this ourselves. I entered the hallway ever so slowly, trying to remain composed so my children knew Mommy had everything under control and there was nothing to be feared. I'll tell you right now I failed! I looked for 'this bug' mainly on the floor, searching with my eyes, wondering what I might find, until I gazed upward and saw the thing. I couldn't help it; I went in full panic mode and I screamed like a kindergarten schoolgirl who just dropped their newly made two scoop ice cream cone on the sidewalk! It was perched atop the hall bathroom edge frame looked down at all of us, as we stared back at it. I told the kids to stay calm, even though I myself was the one who was freaking out. Normally I would have yelled for my husbands help but unfortunately he was not home so it was up to me alone to take on the daunting task of getting rid of this 'thing'. My first approach was to grab the broom and dustpan to scoop the roach up in, followed by my next plan of flushing it down the toilet. If only it were that easy... I went to get the broom quickly so the creature wouldn't disappear in my absence. As I returned to the hallway I swear the roach must have tripled in size and I was terrified to knock it down, but knew I had to. I instructed the kids to get in my daughters bedroom and close the door and then I made my move; I swung the broom to push the roach onto the tile floor but as I did my earlier scream was nothing in comparison to the one I let out at that very moment. As soon as my broom edged closer to the horse roach it began to freaking FLY! That's right, you heard me, I had a huge flying roach inside of my house! Never had I encountered a flying roach in my life until that night and I pray I never will again. As I gave out a blood curdling scream, dropped the broom, and ran with both my kids crying behind me, afraid to open their door but did so anyway. I never in my life knew that I could scream, run, and even begin to wet myself all at the same until this night!! Who ever knows what one's body will do when placed in unpleasant and fearful situations! "Momma are you okay?!' I heard my little girl holler running halfway in tears after me. Brave, I thought of her to come out of her bedroom after hearing mommy yell for dear life. "Yes, sweetie, it's just a big roach bug and mommy just does not like bugs. I'm sorry I scared you but really this bug can't hurt us. Mommy just has to get close enough to it to get it into the toilet to flush it and mommy just doesn't like that." "Let's pray Mommy that you'll be brave." I looked at her with tears in my eyes "That's a great idea sweetie because mommy really does need to be a brave mommy right now." My kids and I prayed and then I regrettably went back to the task at hand of getting and flushing that giant roach down the toilet. Ever so carefully and once again I approached the hallway, this time my kids stayed far back in our kitchen as I took on the challenge alone. As soon as I entered the hall I saw it on the tile floor and since my broom was long enough I quickly began jabbing at it (along with short burst of screams) with the straws of the broom. Unfortunately the straw wasn't strong enough and only injured the insect, but thankfully it did so just enough to disable it so that I could swiftly swoop it into the dustpan while it was still on it's backside. I walked every so slowly to our hall bathroom as I watched it's legs slowly begin to pick up speed as it jolted around trying to flip itself over. Finally I made it to the toilet and as soon as I began to dump the dustpan over for it to hit the water, the darn roach got the momentum to regain composure and flutter it's wings to fly again. Fortunately I outsmarted this intruder by rapidly slamming the toilet seat down on it before it got away! Hooray! Mommy scores 1, cockroach 0! I flushed the seat immediately and then at least 5 more times after that, just to be on the safe side ya know? Can't take any chances! I was terrified that the little booger was on the underside of the toilet edge (rim) which I could not see unless I shoved my head down far enough, which I was not about to do (of course). Over the next 24 hours (maybe more) I kept that bathroom door locked and instructed the kids to use mommy and daddy's master bathroom inside of our bedroom. I was not about to take any chances in going through a repeat of what I already encountered. So this was the straw that broke mommas back! After being a full time SAHM (Stay At home Mom) for over 2 glorious years, there are many a days that I feel beaten down, lonely, isolated, tired from playing referee over a toy, tired of arguing with my small children to practice their letter sounds, numbers and other academics, but in the end, when it's all said and done, I am very blessed and grateful to have this rare opportunity to watch my children grow day in and out from the many things that life has to offer. And be in well known that I WILL NOT ALLOW A ROACH, FLYING OR OTHER, TO FORCE ME OUT OF WHAT I FEEL GOD HAS CALLED ME TO DO!!! On that note, I hope you don't either!

F.Y.I This is not the actual HUGE roach that was in my home, but the size of it, as you can see is outrageous and similar to the one I was forced to battle. I just found this image on the Internet to show as an example of the kind of enormous pest I was faced to deal with. If you're a man reading this post this type of thing may not disturb you but for most females I know this would be the exact thing that would make us cry for a week, because as we all know, where there is one insect, there very well may be many hiding out in the same place. Please pray that this is not the case.

After note: After sharing this story, half in tears, while my husband hysterically laughed at my expense (which I did not appreciate) he did finally agree to hire a reputable pest control to come to our home so that we will not be faced with this kind of thing again. As earlier stated this is not the first roach we had come across in our home this summer and I dread the idea of running into one again. Not to mention if there is one, there are more than likely others and who knows if one might be pregnant causing many, many more to be on the inside of our walls and home. I think something like this might cause me to take my kids and stay in a hotel temporarily until there's a semi-guarantee the pesticides being used are known to be an affective deterrent of such creatures.

A helpful tip: I have heard one helpful tip for any of you who may have suffered this yourselves; that if you have starchy foods in your pantry, such as potatoes please make sure you keep them in a locked container, as roaches are very attracted to such snacks to feed on. They are also drawn to sitting water and dark, closed sheltered areas. Once you find one try to take measures quickly to get rid of them as a pregnant roach can drop as many as 40 eggs at one time. YUCK!

Tal & Acadia

*TAL & ACACIA, 'WAKE ME' CD Not to long ago I received a message through my 'Contact Us' blog site tab sent to my email from a woman by the name of Kristen from Provident Music Group asking me if I would be willing and interested in listening to one of their newer Christian artist Cd's, duo sisters Tal & Acacia and then asking if I would share my feedback about their music on a blog posting. This is the first time I had been approached by a company to ask for my thoughts about some music they would be sending me and since it was of a Christian Faith, naturally I was intrigued so I agreed. Well just yesterday I received the two Cd's (one to keep for myself and the other to us as a give away). I listened to 'Wake Me' by the duo—sisters Tal & Acacia and I've gotta say that while listening to their music in my truck with my two young kids in the back seat that it was very different, yet invigorating and fresh. Tal & Acacia music is defined under the category as Pop/Alternative/Christian and rightfully so; it matches this league yet is also in a league of its own. My initial first impression of this CD was that the music had a little too much of a 'twang' for my taste and I also felt that it had a childlike, kind of teenage type of style to it, yet it didn't take me long to find that after just listening to their songs but a couple of times that I began singing the chorus to their words in my mind, craving to listen to their soundtrack again.

The beat from the music in this CD, Wake Me, is somewhat 'different' (if you will) but also very moving and alive, and the lyrics are very catchy. But for me what changes my 'like it' to 'love it' was the words and common life conflicts that they display through their talented writing of songs. For me this is a BIG hit with any music I listen to; if I can relate to the message in what the song is producing than I am more often than not won over by the piece of melody, which was the case with 'Wake Me'. For instance the song 'Garbage In', was a very convicting one that challenged me to look at my own reflection in the mirror at what potential 'garbage' I have allowed in my own personal life. Same goes for the song 'Merry Go Round', which for me, spoke to me on a Spiritual level about moving out of my own comfort zone of everyday routines to venture out and seek God for His will and desire for my life, and less of my own fleshly wants.

I began to very much enjoy the music and as a HUGE bonus it was very family friendly in that I could listen to it while in the company of my almost 6 yr. old and almost 4 yr. old children. In fact my soon to be 6 year old daughter continually asked that I replay 'Garbage In' repeatedly as she loved the way it sounded; she even began to try to memorize the words! I explained the meaning behind the song; that the Garbage (meaning if you put the wrong information in your mind/heart, the results coming out will also be wrong) and she actually seemed to have gotten that concept. I don't know how well she's gotten the understanding of it, but all I can say is later during the evening when she was playing in her younger brother bedroom I overheard her telling him what the song represents. This is what I heard her say as I quietly listened to her convere with Little Jesse, her younger brother: 'The 'garbage' is what Satan fills your mind with like when you want to watch a cartoon with guns then you'll start to pretend to be that garbage and want to use guns too and I don't want you to use guns because they hurt people, okay little Jesse?!' Pronounced with a firm exclamation at the end of her instructions to him.

Such is the case in the adult world as well, or any age for that matter. So whether that it be watching a seductive TV show, viewing pornography on the Internet, hanging around crowds that try to persuade you into doing inappropriate activities such as drinking, driving and drinking, drugs, robbery, cursing, etc, anything that would move you further away from the Lord is to be considered garbage. Doing such things long enough is going to come out in the one who is surrounding themselves with it. So for me personally, this song, 'Garbage In', was my favorite, maybe it's because the song really spoke to me on a personal and spiritual note of conviction or maybe it's because I was touched by how much my own 5 year old daughter quickly was drawn to the lyrics; I'm not sure, but for me it has always been and will always be that anytime a song forces or prompts me to view my own convictions in my life, drawing me to serve Him better and stronger, than the song almost immediately has me wrapped around it's finger!!!

Soon after I received a request to review the CD 'Wake Me' I received another email from a Christian Homeschooling Company asking if I would be interested in reviewing some of their homeschooling products and also doing a blog posting about my review on it as well. I was in shock because both of these companies contacted me through my blog within just weeks of one another, and in the same way that I agreed to review the Christian CD I also agreed to review Crossway's Homeschooling supplies, which I am awaiting for now. I am excited about this product since I will be able to give an accurate review by applying the homeschooling material to my own kindergartner and preschooler and watch to see how they measure up with their understanding of the academics involved. I only hope that it lives up to our expectations, which I don't doubt it will. Please keep your eye out for this review as I hope to post it hopefully before school begin.

Talk to me! (Requested question by my sister-n-law, Mari).

Greetings my friends, During a late afternoon conversation yesterday with my sister-in-law, Mari, she asked me if I would pose a question on my blog in hopes to get a variety of replies from others. At first she directed this question seeking Christian replies but later wanted to know how non Christians felt about this from their perspective too. So here I am doing just that. Here is what she would like to know: (Well I'll just copy and paste the question she asked in her own words on Facebook): For those of you that are Christians: Do you feel your Faith should be limited to only church or with other Christians? Do you think it is tacky if someone shows a cross in public. ie: cross necklace, cross displayed on a T-shirt or farm on Farm Town (this is a Facebook application game)? What do you think God says about this? Do you think He would want us to keep our Faith confined in certain places? Want to know as I am currently discussing this topic w/someone :) After some of the replies she received on Facebook, she later asked for non-Christians to share their input as well and how they felt about this. One of the woman on her wall replied with this: "I feel that Christianity should be shared with all. There are many ways to do this including what you wear, how you act and of course talking about your beliefs with others no matter where you are at. God says that we are to go out and spread the word, not just discuss it with other Christians. If we only talked to other Christians then how would the word be spread?" -Facebook Member I 100% agree with this reply to my sister in laws question and now Mari would be blessed to hear your thoughts about this if you don't mind sharing.... By the way my sister-in-law, Mari, is a saved woman herself so she isn't asking this by her own thoughts, but from a conversation she was having with another Facebook member, though supposedly a Christian herself, this other woman felt it was too 'showy' for Mari to have a cross displayed on one of the games she plays on that network; Farmville. You can meet Mari and follow the replies to this question she asked on her facebook wall yesterday by clicking here. Of course if you don't have a Facebook account you'll have to open one up first in order to follow the replies on this open-ended conversation. Of if you'd like you can simply leave a comment here and I'm sure Mari will leave some comments behind you at some point during the day.

Praise Report - To God Be The Glory!

After sharing my post titled 'I just need a good cry!' with some of the struggles I felt that I was drowning in slowly, but not terribly slowly, God has begun to speak to me about 'sink or swim'. He has spoken through many of my wonderful friend such as yourselves, my wonderful mother in law, my oldest sister Mary, my husband, and during quiet time alone with Him in prayer and tears. He has heard my frustration and has helped me find the strength to pull myself out of the pit I had fallen into by getting up and moving. My husband and I had been visiting various churches over the last several weeks, 5 different churches to be exact, and we finally feel we are getting close to settle down with one that meets our entire family needs. The church has been very welcoming from the very beginning to when we first entered their entry doors last week. In fact there was one woman who said to me 'I think I know you, what is your name?', to which I replied 'Yeah, you look familiar to me as well, I am Sarah (last name).' She then introduced herself as she walked our family to the children's church service building. She is one of the other mother's who was volunteering to help when I was the 'room mom' in Jewels Kindergarten class last year and she was very helpful in working with me as it had been my first year to volunteer at the school. She even made the comment to me 'You've lost weight haven't you?' I wanted to jump up and shout 'Okay, we've found our church!!!' lol. But she was right; I had lost quite a bit of weight because I have been working super hard at eating healthier foods, smaller proportions, and getting exercise in more unusual ways like mowing our yard and edging the grass, or similar hot and sweaty jobs that bring much cardiovascular activity. Not fun but kills two birds with one stone; yard work gets finished and I get my heart rate pumping and exhausted; burning fat and building muscle. There are many things my husband and I look for in a church; one being the welcoming we feel upon our visit there, the general 'feel' from the congregation: Do they seem uptight? Do they respond or feel engaged to what the Pastor is preaching with nods of their heads or are some falling asleep? Are our children being taught in their class while we are being taught in service? Are they learning or just playing? Does the church share the same beliefs we do about God, His Son, The Holy Spirit, Water Baptism?; just to name a few. Do they offer other ministry services like Sunday School, Women's or Men's Group ministries of fellowship where we can get to know and bond with others like us? Do they challenge us to grow and equip us to serve within and outside of the church to those who need to hear about God's awesome unconditional love? Well the Church we've attended the last two weeks seems to have all of these blessings and then some. There is also a nice variety of diversity in this church, not limited by color, heritage, age, dress, or anything else. And the church is not too large where we feel overlooked and it's not too small either where we feel it's roots aren't defined and organized yet. Quite the opposite; this church feels to us like a place that we hope to visualize as a place that our family can grow with while learning to be better stewards for Christ. The church is Bayshore Baptist. Jesse and I are very excited about learning and befriending the members of this church more over the next several weeks while we pray asking the Lord if this is the church God would have us be planted in. As some of you know church 'shopping' is a very heavy and mentally exhausting task and one that can take a lot of time, observation, and heavy, heavy prayer asking Christ to lead us to a place we can call 'home' away from home. If any of you have been at this place like we have been than you can understand and appreciate the urgent need we feel to find the right place to immerse our family into on a Spiritual level; a church that desires to grow together in unity but more importantly in serving our Master, Jesus Christ. Dr. Mark Redd, Pastor of Bayshore Baptist Church shared an awesome message today about how we as Christ followers can either be a scardey-cat or persevere as a Lion killer during certain situations we may face. (He was continuing on from his message last week about Benaiah: The Lion Killer.) The message taught today was one that I myself was being ministered through the Holy Spirit already; sitting idle in my troubles or doing something about them by slaying them and continuing to move forward. Isn't it so awesome how God already begins to work on one's heart condition and then brings it full term to a message that you are being ministered through at the church as well?? I just love that!!! Please continue to pray for our family as we also pray and seek His Holiness in planting our family at the church that He has in store for us. Thank you already for everything you have been to us; a family, a friend, a firm believer in Christ striving to do His will.

Disappointment!

Our 3 year old face of disappointment when he learned that all of the men on the ball field suddenly 'disappeared' when he was so ready to join in on the game. He loves to play ball and the look on his face speaks for itself over his hurt in not being 'welcomed' to join in on the fun of playing baseball. After all, me as his mom, preferred he not play with a bunch of teenage boys and men who were fathers themselves, with him being only 3 years old, but none-the-less it still broke my heart that his passion to play with them was quickly shattered. It's always hard to witness your child express hurt even if it is just over playing a game of ball; it is still his love. And when I say it's his 'love' I mean it to the fullest extent; he even watches the big league professional games on the sports channel with daddy.

Thankfully, unknown to him, we will be registering him in Tee-Ball which registration begins in August for fall ball to begin this year. We haven't told 'Happy' this just in case someone in registration argues about his age (so far everyone has told us he has to be 4 by the registration date and he won't be turning 4 until 2 weeks later). We did manage to speak with a man higher up the chain who directed us to another coach who is willing to accept our son to begin Tee-Ball for this upcoming fall. The only thing he suggested we work on with him is getting him used to hitting the baseball from the Tee-Ball (he doesn't like to hit it from there but likes us to throw it instead), but balls aren't normally pitched to younger players until they reach age 7. He also advised us to get him practicing to catch the ball when he is in outfield, which this will be something new, as we have never worked on him with this.

So next week we are going to Academy to have him fitted for a youth glove mitt for catching balls either in the air or on the ground and then trying to teach him to throw it to his closest team player who will make an 'out' of the opposing baseball team.

I don't know much about baseball myself but am quickly learning just by watching the games my husband does on the Sports Channel.

It will be a busy end of summer as both our kids will be in cheer leading and youth baseball but well worth the excitement to watch them flourish in their desired recreational activity.

I just need a good CRY! (sniff, sniff) ;-(

I'm convinced more than ever that women are more apt to have stronger emotions, feelings of overwhelming and possible break downs more than a man is. The past two weeks months has been crazy in all sense of the word. I feel as though I have zero control over my two children, my husband has certain expectations of me that I can't seem to live up to, and every since I've been a full time SAHM my social life has been dead. I have missed church more than I ever have prior to before I was saved by Christ. I am 'spent', drained, and can not seem to get a foot hold on many of the things I once did. I'm afraid to go to church because I know the children's ministry will just ask me to help them watch the babies/kids, which I've done for so long and how can I say 'no' to helping out when needed? Yet I so badly want to be in service and bond with Christian females who visit one another, pray together, and possibly have kids the same ages. I desperately want females that share in my same faith to become great friends with! The only scenery and world I know is of being in the house 95% of the time with a 3 and 5 year old. Whereas my husband has a world outside of this, he is good about helping with the kids (at times) and is a great cook (otherwise we'd probably all die.). But he also gets to leave the house often to his job. Not saying that his job isn't hard work because believe me I know working with Acid is very dangerous work. But the point is that he gets that outlet to have a different scenery, a different world where he converses with male adults, sometimes cutting up jokes, sometimes enjoying lunch together, other times working. I'm not making excuses that 'Oh, poor is me that I can stay home and raise my own kids why he foots the bill.' Not at all; I'm just saying my main outlet is my adult talk online, which my husband says is turning into too much Internet usage. He's probably right though. Well he is right. When I read Lauryn's blog post about going on a 'blog-cation' (vacation from blogging) I thought that was such a neat and necessary thing to do when you realize what ones true priorities are. I might just ask her if I can 'steal' that idea and do this myself. I just need to regroup and get things in order so I don't go nuts. Please pray for me; as it stands my husband and I don't even pray as a couple like we once had and we fight more than we used to; mainly about how we differ in disciplining our kids, the lack of intimacy we share, the horrible, horrible heat, ect. I don't know what has come over me or us, but something has got to change for the betterment of our family, children, me. And I know what that change has to be; Christ. Please pray that God will help us to get our priorities in line, our house in order, our affections back where they once were and more imprortantly our prayer life on a regular basis. Thank you all so very much!

Tell Me Thursday

It's been a hectic day so I'm late in posting my Tell Me Thursday, but hey it is still Thursday right? :D My photo from Wordless Wednesday is found here. It is a picture of a board game that my family threw in the fire when we got fed up with it. Can you see what game it is through the fire? If you guessed the famous aged 'Trivial Pursuit' you're absolutely right. It was a couple of years ago when I flew from Houston to Seattle to visit my sister, nephews, and brother in law. The night was getting later and later, colder and colder and conversation was coming to a crawl. It was my wonderful sister who had the bright idea to play this game which I so much dreaded but reluctantly joined in on. After only 30 min. into this mind twisting torture of not so terribly smart individuals we all agreed to ditch this game that seemed to taunt us all. The closest thing nearby was my sisters fireplace which I joyfully (but carefully) started to toss in all of those nerve ending questions on history, science, the Arts, technology, and mind boggling brain teasers. That's right we delightfully watched this game burn to ashes; well maybe not fully into ashes as the game questions are as strict and stubborn as the boardbox itself! But nonetheless, it felt good. I've always hated that game.

My cutest little nephew won 1st place in the Fourth of July Parade!!!!

2009 Fourth Of July Parade

I was blown away today when my SIL emailed me these photo's from their fourth of July Parade in Dallas. She said that thier son, not quite 1 yet, won 1st place and it's no wonder. I was suprised in amazment at the work they put into turning a red wagon and booster seat (?) and made it look so good like an all out armored vehicle! I just adore these pictures and couldn't help but share them.

My newphew

My half-siblings: My younger sister who is in the Army and my younger brother, the proud daddy.

Oh, and of coure the 1st place winner; his son. Better watch out! Looks like he's eyeballin' ya! OHHHH, SO CUTE!!!

Wordless Wednessday

"Under The Sea" Toddler Craft

**Note: To pause a slide simply roll (not click) your mouse over it and it will stop. This is our 5 year old daughter's Toddler Craft entry, which you can do as well. Visit Onnaholl's blog site by clicking here: Toddler Craft to get all the information, guidelines, art craft ideas, and how to enter your own submission. You can also follow Onna on Twitter by just doing a search for Onnaholl. Even if you choose not to enter in the contest, Toddler Craft still has a huge amount of craft ideas geared at specific ages, tips, suggestions, and mounds of other insightful information for any parent to learn and gain knowledge from. And if you subscribe to her site you'll get all the information sent to you email regularly. I was so blessed by some of the emails I've received because they don't just touch on crafts but also on children's stages of development, tips on preparing and getting ready for school and so very much more. If you have young kids, I guarantee you'll be blessed by all the information you'll received. Just click the link above to or the 'button' on this side bar 'Toddler Craft' to view this awesome and very active site! For the donated prized my husband and I have offered for this contest you can view them by clicking here.

I ♥ Faces Constructive Feedback

Unfortunately this IS the 'Original Photo'

I have decided to put my most passionate love of photography on display with I ♥ Faces with their Constructive Feedback Friday to ask them to please give constructive feedback on what I did wrong and what I could have done MUCH better when taking this photo.   I already know that I failed to have the flash going which was a HUGE detriment because I wanted to snap away at so very much during my daughter/sons sibling birthday party that I kept my Nikon D90 on continuous shooting mode.   I can't remember so I'm not sure if I still also had it on the 'Sports' Mode since the party was held in a 'Bounce House' and the kids were actively jumping wild all over the place.

Unfortunately I don't know much more about the photo like the aperature or ISO since I haven't begun my digital photography classes to understand all of this just yet.  I am a little familiar with some of these words/terms/abreviations through great friends I've met through I ♥ Faces.com but I still have quite a bit to learn so this is why I've asked my friends and editors of this site to please consider helping me fix this photo that I would just love to keep for memories of my son's 4th baseball party 'Bounce House' birthday.

Below is my edited photo that all I felt I could do was try to lighten the photo up some, but as you can see, it is still a VERY poor photo with a lot of grain...isn't that what photographers refer to as 'noise'?

                                      

Oh, and THANK GOD I am subscribed to http://iheartfaces.blogspot.com/ to have this 'Constructive Friday Feedback' show up in my email inbox so that I could quickly jump on some much need professional assistance.  Usually my photo's aren't  THIS bad but sometimes I do sadly snap away thinking everything will turn out great only to insert my memory card into my laptop and discover that all the birthday photo's look just as the one on top, which is very, very disappointing for both mom and dad!

So thank you I ♥ Faces for having this special opportunity and I am ever so anxious to see what you wonderful experts do with this photo, or at least give me in plain English the directions of what I should have done better or can still do to this picture (and maybe my other ones from the party) to 'save' it so I can prevent this from happening in the future.

If you love photography like I do, than your missing out if you haven't already visited their blog by not getting all of the wonderful free tips, tricks and trades of the Photography 'world' for free.  I have already met a lot of wonderful people on their site who have helped me tremendously (of course I never showed any of them this photo.LOL).  So visit their site and click on the left sidebar 'This week's Contests' badge and check out all the awesome photo entries that hundreds of photo lovers, like myself have submitted.  And then check out the rest of their other badges like 'Tutorials', 'Give Aways', and 'Fix It Fridays'.  It's really amazing all the awesome pictures and faces you'll see and when you check out 'Fix It Fridays' it's incredible how these people make awesome transformations in a variety of forms with just one photo; and they all look so great!!

So what're you waiting for?  GO!

Stop talking and START listening.

This is what I have felt soaked on me by the Holy Spirit since the evening from last night up until and including now. It's been lingering around my gut, down in my spirit and now pouring out of my mouth. The Holy Spirit has feel upon me and I'm fighting not to just scream these words that rest so strongly on the inside out at the top of my lungs. I'm not sure exactly in which manner the Lord is directing me with this guiding whisper of His, however I have been seeking Him out since 4ish this early morning. When the Holy Spirit is upon me it makes it extremely difficult to sleep or do much of anything else except to just sit with Him, absorbing His presence and worshiping the Greatness that He is.

Truth be told; I feel that His message is aimed directly to me on a personal level. I have a tendency to talk; sometimes too much. And you don't have to have met me or hear my voice to know this. A lot of you probably already realize this by my super long comments on your blogs or emails I've sent to you. I won't lie; even I admit they can be very long-winded.

This is something that I've battled with for quite some time, though not forever. In fact as a young woman I was actually very much the opposite; I was extremely quiet and introverted, shy, and kept mainly to myself. I used to pray asking God to provide me with a new confidence to open up and feel freedom instead of self-consciousness when I shared in group conversations at church, tried to make new friends, or even just braving it to say a simple 'Hello' to the stranger seated next to me during Sunday service. See, when I was a little girl, bigger girl, teenager, and then young lady, I was always very self-conscious to the point of sobbing myself to sleep at night. If you don't know much about the pain of extreme shyness you may not understand the gripping stronghold it has over someone. Let me enlighten you that from how it affected me I began to hate myself with a very deep, deep hate and anger that during one lonely night I had even considered hurting myself, though thankfully I did not. It was something the enemy had a strong-hold over me in and with everything in me I tried to break through it, pray through it, and 'bind' it, but it was a very, very slow process to finally gain 'some ground' with being loosened by this fear of anybody noticing me, which overwhelmed me. Maybe that sentence didn't quite make sense. If not allow me to better explain.

See, the point is that for many, many years growing up I did not ever want anyone to notice me; I just wanted to be left to myself in my own tight group of friends that I knew for years. I didn't invite or encourage change because I didn't do well with it; it was a threat to my comfort zone. Any outsider that tried to befriend my small group of friends and I was greeted with an unwelcome gaze from me as I tried to make it obvious they simply....well.....were not welcome. With some 'intruders' my silence in the group was very clear and assumed by them that I didn't care to participate with that newcomer, but what they didn't realize was that this was just who I was; nothing personal. However, admittedly, when it came to any outsiders entering 'my arena' this familiar quiet side of me that was well known to others made it easy for me to use this as a weapon against that unfamiliar guest. I tried my best to repel the intruder and it wasn't always terribly hard. So easy in fact that it was my own private, little secret. I used what I hated most about myself to my advantage from time to time and I didn't even have to make my own excuses for it because my own friends did for me. It was easy to pawn off when confronted by a friend by a simple reply of manipulation 'How can you think I'm trying to be rude to her/him? You know I've always been quiet!' Therefore others would also state this about my expressed disapproval of that individual by making excuses for me like 'That's just how Sarah is; she's just quiet until you get to know her a bit. No, I don't think she's trying to exclude you so try not to take it personally; she's just shy.' But truth be told I was trying to exclude and shut that person out 100%! What I didn't know at the time was that I myself was about to be invaded by a very different kind of Intruder; the One that would begin the freedom process of the chains that bound for so, so long. I was about to be re-introduced to Jesus Christ for the first time. (I say re-introduced to define that I had already known of Jesus, God, the Word, but didn't know Jesus, God, the Word; personally. There's a very big difference.) Well for now I've gotta get the kids ready to take the their Dental Appt. To be continued.....